Reptiliandude: To answer an anonymous question about my usage of British quotation marks but American usage of commas within the same.

Many years ago, before my current suit of skin, I worked as a type-setter in the American Colonies.

This was back before the university standard of spelling and punctuation developed into a required thing.

In fact, I was a strong proponent for getting away from the evolving (and class-distinctive) methods of spelling; and rather, incorporating a spelling system which spelled words more like the way that they sounded—as Spanish does.

In other words, I encouraged the promotion of a system in which words like through would be threw and rough would be ruff and so on.

I wasn’t alone, but the idea didn’t go very far no matter who I had proposed it to…

Because, despite the colonists desire to break away from the English crown, there were still aristocratic leanings those in control of the current class-system could not and would not divest themselves from.

Nonetheless, wilst I was a typesetter, each letter was an individual block and the sentences I was building which contained commas and periods were far more stable when incorporated into the scheme of the quotation marks themselves.

So it was an American typeset machine which determined much of my usage of the English language and such mechanical contrivances eventually changed the American usage of the written word as well.

The internet, that unholy electronic descendant of a tryst between a town crier, a printing press and a typewriter is doing the same thing as well, whether some people like it or not.

So yes, my spelling is occasionally a mix of one geographic region with another, as I also use a lot of the letter ‘z,’ instead of ‘s,’ (as in the word realiZe which is an American convention more than one might realiSe).

Because, I still personally think that it really is just better to just spell a word how it sounds.

I also break up my statements into improper paragraphs to facilitate easier reading on mobile devices and so on.

I also don’t put commas between certain conjunctions such as and unless I want to ‘sound’ somewhat pretentious (or distinctly American) in my writing.

In other words, I break a lot of rules that were in all truthfulness simply put there to distinguish one side of the pond from another, or one class of people from another, but for me it’s really just more of a style preference than it is anything else.

I suppose that I could be more strict in such things, but it really doesn’t matter to me as I’ve lived in both places, and see no reason not to subtly demonstrate the same in my writing style, despite how much it might anger the purists.

As I just did in the above example by my rare usage of the Harvard comma as discussed earlier.

No doubt someone, somewhere, is screaming, “It’s an Oxford comma!”

And that’s the fun of it all, because it’s also called the Harvard comma primarily because it’s Yanks who use it in a manner mistakenly applied to British usage.

Oxford actually being in the UK and all…

Unless, of course you’re a Brit, and you intend to sound ‘pretentious’ or American.

But then, you never did rule over a global empire where you absolutely had to learn geography or the existence of any place other than Podunk, USA. Have you?

Oh, yes… you have those brown, Spanish speaking lost tribes of Israel below you building your Vegas pyramids and those quaint, glue-sniffing, French speaking, high-bastard sons of Pepe above you—where they finally raised the age of consent from 14 to16 (in 2008, no less). But, who won’t even deign to let someone with a speeding ticket or an anti-feminist stance step even one bloody foot past their Marxist Mounties without a thorough prostate exam and a note written in blood from their own Mum, declaring that ‘He really is a good boy.”

Lols all around.

I of course meant no offense to our fabulous cousins of proper English blood, brow-beaten into feminized submission by progressivists and professional grievance mongerers.

Serpents are subtle, and we are not good rule followers.

So, whether it’s just laziness on my part or a conscious desire to avoid convention, which in some cases has now become an acquired habit, your guess is probably as good as mine.

Oh, and sorry for taking so long to respond to your query, I didn’t realize it was consuming so much of your thoughts as it certainly wasn’t consuming mine.

Cheers.

dogsdontfly:

No doubt someone, somewhere, is screaming, “It’s an Oxford comma!”

Took the words right out of my mouth. 😀

In response to your frequent dogging on our language, I have a counter-stance to put forth.

I understand the beauty of your own language, as I think you’ve portrayed the development of your own tongue to have risen out of a deep understanding of the universe around you, but give some credence to ours.

You’ve criticized words like “atom,” which, at its root, means “indivisible.” While we now know the atom is far from indivisible, words like this speak to our own history. A study of etymology reveals a constant theme of discovery on the part of our species, and with it, a historical record of growing understanding becomes inherent in our words. The continued usage of words whose root meaning no longer apply serve as memorials to who we are and what we used to “know.”

I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I think it’s an intriguing example of our own development that keeps our own history embedded within our words.

DankNethers: You know, there was a rather portly printer from that time who had similar views on phonetic spelling

He loved a good swim… Got on well enough with the French… And was frequently in the company of much younger women, the old pervert

Happen to ever meet him?

Reptiliandude: Are you sure you’re not mistaking him for a ‘James Franklin?’

James had a teenaged younger brother who I encouraged to write for a local paper under a pseudonym.

But I would be hard pressed to recollect that little ‘dogooder’s’ name…

ACuriousHumanBeing: Listen to the ‘Silence’. They will remind you.

Have the latest copy of the “The New-England Courant” Draco? Sadly such a paper is now out of print.

DankNethers:

Yup that’s the one…

The bespeckled (or bi-focaled?) crackpot from the Colonies

Though rather hard to Silence… Especially after that Caramel Swan Hoof worked it’s magic

So one might assume you worked amongst many such luminaries of this young country’s infancy

Who was the funniest?

Reptiliandude: Thomas Paine.

DankNethers: I think you’d have an interesting perspective if you were ever to write historical non-fiction

Like what really happened in the Hellfire Club…

Reptiliandude: There are terrifying and solemn oaths one must take before the scales are removed form their eyes.

I will not speak of such things here.

Garbotalk: Mason oaths…always hiding from the proletariat, whether its building techniques, architecture, scientific discovery or the fact that aliens live among us and always have.

Garbotalk: Always you defer when questioned about your past. You’ve admitted to a few names. Why not your colonial one?

Franklin’s work with the double helix later credited to Cricke, for example. It would be nice to know what really happened during our nation’s formation.

I bet Thomas Jefferson was pretty interesting, as well as the loathario Franklin.

Reptiliandude: Now you’re trying to be funny. You know damn good and well that’s not the same Franklin. Are you just testing me to see where I’m browsing the subreddit?

Garbotalk: Trying to draw you out, dear RD, as usual. Correcting me often gets you talking. 😜

You know I’ve seen you there in my dreams, during colonial days, influencing patriots. I was hoping you’d share more about it here.

Reptiliandude: Not now. It’s really been too much today. I’m feeling a bit melancholic from talking about my childhood, and need to go out for a walk or something.

Garbotalk: The thing about a difficult childhood is, it made you who you are. And that guy is pretty awesome!

Music, video games and lemonade may straighten you out.

Reptiliandude: You’re kind. Thank you.

Garbotalk: Hugs

explorer1357: Wait, what?? Yall see each other in dreams?

Garbotalk: Sometimes.

explorer1357: Thats awesome!!

I would wish I saw RD in dreams too, but then that would be gay so…